It is the best of times, it is the worst of times
I don't have good and bad days I have good and bad hours.
I was alone most of the day yesterday as I am today. Gretchen is the daughter in charge and she has a real job with real hours.
Yesterday morning she changed my dressing before work and put me back down for a nap. About 10 I felt good enough to want to get up, even got dressed and was going to have something to eat. Rita happened to be on her way in while I was getting up so we visited for a while. I had some lunch, the nurse came at 3 and changed me again and I decided to lie down again. A pretty good day.
By 4:15, I was crying like a baby. The kind of cry that required sobs and gasps between breaths.. I was crying because of great pain. I could ring the bell and no one would come. I could call out a name and no one would come. I had to get out of bed and get my own pills if I wanted some relief (I have since learned to keep a supply by my bed - but too late smart) It took almost an hour (with all the crying going on) to get out of bed and get to the pills (which were a recent refill and in an impossible to open cap), get the pills down my, get back to the bed and for the crying to subside.
That's how I am.
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2 comments:
Just when I was sure you would get better, this happens. It is quite disappointing, and for you --- I can't imagine how your disappointment must feel. This must correct itself sometime, there must be light at the end of the tunnel. I must admit I forgot to pray for you, but that will be corrected now.
I'll add my prayers to Marcel's. It doesn't seem fair that you could go through the back surgery and then have pain everywhere else. I feel guilty for feeling so well. Even Kim and Debbie are having medical problems. Both have been to the Mayo Clinic in Jax., and Debbie has been diagnosed with osteoarthritis in the spine, lumbar, and cervical areas and also pain in the knees. Kim is on a different type of Enbrel now because the first one was messing with her immune system. Both of them still go into work every day and Debbie says she is hurting all the time at work, and by the time she gets home, she takes a pain pill, a muscle relaxer, and goes to bed. I really feel guilty for feeling so good in comparison. So I'm praying for the 3 of you.
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