Many tears have been shed in our family, tears of sorrow, tears of joy, but mostly tears of laughter. These tears have gotten us through everything life has given us. So through our tears in losing our mommy we have shared our laughter as we remember all of the happiness she gave us.
We invite you to share in our celebration of her life. We will be gathering for a memorial dinner on Friday, January 4, 2008 at Angelo's Brothers at 6:00 please join us and bring a story to contribute. RSVPs at pylevh@aol.com would be appreciated. Those of you with stories to share that are unable to attend please send it to us either in the comments or in an email again at pylevh@aol.com and we will display them at the memorial.
We would like to thank you for your comments and support as we dealt with everything these past few weeks. Through the wonder of technology we were given instant access to your love and encouragement, words can not express what these meant to us.
We look forward to seeing everyone on Friday.
The Daughters
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Pain Free
Mommy passed quietly in her sleep tonight at midnight. Her breathing was labored with the fluid filling her lungs and stopped a couple of times before the actual end.
We are working on plans for a memorial service. We will post as soon as details are finalized.
We are working on plans for a memorial service. We will post as soon as details are finalized.
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Privacy
Part of the Hospice care is a private room. At 7pm mom was moved to her sixth room in two weeks. She is settled in and so are we. She has not regained lucidity at all, and continues to moan/cry until we can get more morphine into her. She is entitled to 1-4 mg of morphine and a dose of Atavan every hour. If she is sleeping we have not asked for it, but when she is agitated we look for the nurse immediately.
Some News is...
Just bad news.
Gretchen talked to Dr. Soo late last night and we all met with Dr. Ghassan this morning. The consensus was that the infection is very aggressively moving through her body. They said that they could do a whole body scan and lance and drain every abscess they find, but since she is already on the most potent antibiotics available it would be a painful and, eventually, a losing battle. Dr. Soo said that even keeping her on massive amounts of antibiotics he would not expect her to last a week. So the upshot is, our mommy is going to die.
We have followed her directives and our own hearts and stopped all treatment as of this morning. The doctors did not disagree with this, in fact they both seemed to think it was the best possible choice. The hospital moved fast and we have already done the paperwork to admit her into hospice care here at Providence. She has been evaluated by the hospice nurse and they are currently requesting a private room.
We are taking turns breaking down and comforting each other, but we are strong when we need to be. One of the doctors commented that this was a very strong decision to make and we told him that mom did not raise any weak women. Those of you that are a praying sort please change your prayers so that this part of the process will be as quick and painless as possible.
Gretchen talked to Dr. Soo late last night and we all met with Dr. Ghassan this morning. The consensus was that the infection is very aggressively moving through her body. They said that they could do a whole body scan and lance and drain every abscess they find, but since she is already on the most potent antibiotics available it would be a painful and, eventually, a losing battle. Dr. Soo said that even keeping her on massive amounts of antibiotics he would not expect her to last a week. So the upshot is, our mommy is going to die.
We have followed her directives and our own hearts and stopped all treatment as of this morning. The doctors did not disagree with this, in fact they both seemed to think it was the best possible choice. The hospital moved fast and we have already done the paperwork to admit her into hospice care here at Providence. She has been evaluated by the hospice nurse and they are currently requesting a private room.
We are taking turns breaking down and comforting each other, but we are strong when we need to be. One of the doctors commented that this was a very strong decision to make and we told him that mom did not raise any weak women. Those of you that are a praying sort please change your prayers so that this part of the process will be as quick and painless as possible.
Friday, December 28, 2007
No News is...
No News!!
While I was there this morning mom had her wound vac (on the original wound) changed, she had a bath, and she had the draining of her foot. I saw Dr. Little, Dr. Ghassan, and Dr. Houseman. I thought she might be done for the day so when Aunt Rita got there around 12:30 I went downstairs to the cafeteria for lunch. Of course, as soon as I was gone Dr. Soo showed up. He talked to Aunt Rita and mentioned that he thought there was more infection in her other foot and in her shoulder again. He wants to do a whole body scan to find out where all of the infection is. She told him that he needed to talk to me and he said he would as soon as I came back up. I was back upstairs by 1:30 but when they tried to find him he was in surgery. They told us it would only be few hours, but when Gretchen showed up at 6pm we still had not heard from him. I waited another three hours and still nothing. The nurses left messages but still nothing. Gretch will be there all night so if he shows up someone will be there.
Mom has been out of it most of the day. When she comes to at all it is only babble something incoherent and then she drifts back out. She ate a few bites of sausage at breakfast and drank an Ensure but she has had nothing since then. They finally finished her morning pills with some apple sauce and I got her to take some pills tonight with a few swallows on Ensure but it was very hard.
We will let you know more when we know.
While I was there this morning mom had her wound vac (on the original wound) changed, she had a bath, and she had the draining of her foot. I saw Dr. Little, Dr. Ghassan, and Dr. Houseman. I thought she might be done for the day so when Aunt Rita got there around 12:30 I went downstairs to the cafeteria for lunch. Of course, as soon as I was gone Dr. Soo showed up. He talked to Aunt Rita and mentioned that he thought there was more infection in her other foot and in her shoulder again. He wants to do a whole body scan to find out where all of the infection is. She told him that he needed to talk to me and he said he would as soon as I came back up. I was back upstairs by 1:30 but when they tried to find him he was in surgery. They told us it would only be few hours, but when Gretchen showed up at 6pm we still had not heard from him. I waited another three hours and still nothing. The nurses left messages but still nothing. Gretch will be there all night so if he shows up someone will be there.
Mom has been out of it most of the day. When she comes to at all it is only babble something incoherent and then she drifts back out. She ate a few bites of sausage at breakfast and drank an Ensure but she has had nothing since then. They finally finished her morning pills with some apple sauce and I got her to take some pills tonight with a few swallows on Ensure but it was very hard.
We will let you know more when we know.
Long Update
We have been getting a little frustrated with the number of doctors coming in and out of mom's room and saying different things. Last night one of the doctor's said how much mom needed the fluids and then the next one said that we needed to control the swelling. I am doing this post mostly to inform my sisters and to keep it all straight in my own head.
Anyway, Dr Houseman was just here and he tried to explain the coordination of care. I think Dr. Richard's did not read the progress reports last night and that was part of our problems. It doesn't help that I thought he was Dr. Houseman and I assumed a certain knowledge from him. Note to doctors: never enter a room without your name tag showing who you are.
Mom had an abscess from her foot drained today (yeah, that was fun) and Dr. Little will be looking at the cultures (probably in a few days) and then she will make a decision about keeping or changing her antibiotics. Hopefully she will tell about this decision. The abscess in her shoulder was a staph infection, just like her back, so the antibiotics stayed the same. Dr. Houseman explained that now that it has been drained the antibiotics can get to any infection left in her foot.
Dr. Ghassan has decreased her fluid intake to a trickle (the trickle keeps the line open) and hopefully her swelling will come down. He is very worried about what she is eating (next to nothing) and her loopiness. She is very rarely coherent and we have been getting more and more hail marys. So he has decreased her pain medication by taking off the smaller fentynyl patch. It is a fine line that they need to walk between tolerable pain and coherence. I hate that line. But she is not so loopy that she won't lie. When we or the doctors ask her something directly we can usually get an answer. Dr. Ghassan was asking her why she was not eating and she said she didn't know. When he turned away she asked for some milk and when I said "you want some milk?" She said "I just want them to think I am eating more."
Dr. Houseman said that Dr. Soo will be here sometime today but it may be late, to evaluate her abscesses that have been drained. He said that he will review everything and when the time comes he will let us know what type of facility she should be released to. I asked if that was a split second decision; if they decide tomorrow do we have to be out the next day, and he said no. He said that more than likely what would happen is if one of the Long Term Acute Care places accept her and Dr. Soo can see nothing that would keep her in the hospital (blood pressure, heart rate, etc. stabilized) then they would discuss it with us and release her to that facility.
The PT person happened to be in the hallway when we were talking and I asked about PT. I asked if they would be working with mom everyday and the PT person said "no" only three times a week and they count the "sleeping" time as her being seen. She tried to explain that it is based on need, but I said that that would suggest that mom be seen everyday since her need was great. But that is not the case, they see the people that will be released in a few days every day, but those that will be here longer and will be released into long-term therapy are seen less. I argued the logic of this with her for a while but she was not budging. Hospital policy. [Just reading this over I think we forgot to tell you that mom was seen by PT and it did not go well, she could not even sit up on her own she just flopped back on the bed.]
I just tried to give mom some pills and she coughed a lot through the first few and then she chewed the second set (yuck). When I asked her if I should raise her head up so she could swallow better she said something about Karl telling her that "up" was better, then she said "smart boy, that Karl." I have a few more pills to give her but she is sleeping now and may do better when she wakes up.
Anyway, Dr Houseman was just here and he tried to explain the coordination of care. I think Dr. Richard's did not read the progress reports last night and that was part of our problems. It doesn't help that I thought he was Dr. Houseman and I assumed a certain knowledge from him. Note to doctors: never enter a room without your name tag showing who you are.
Mom had an abscess from her foot drained today (yeah, that was fun) and Dr. Little will be looking at the cultures (probably in a few days) and then she will make a decision about keeping or changing her antibiotics. Hopefully she will tell about this decision. The abscess in her shoulder was a staph infection, just like her back, so the antibiotics stayed the same. Dr. Houseman explained that now that it has been drained the antibiotics can get to any infection left in her foot.
Dr. Ghassan has decreased her fluid intake to a trickle (the trickle keeps the line open) and hopefully her swelling will come down. He is very worried about what she is eating (next to nothing) and her loopiness. She is very rarely coherent and we have been getting more and more hail marys. So he has decreased her pain medication by taking off the smaller fentynyl patch. It is a fine line that they need to walk between tolerable pain and coherence. I hate that line. But she is not so loopy that she won't lie. When we or the doctors ask her something directly we can usually get an answer. Dr. Ghassan was asking her why she was not eating and she said she didn't know. When he turned away she asked for some milk and when I said "you want some milk?" She said "I just want them to think I am eating more."
Dr. Houseman said that Dr. Soo will be here sometime today but it may be late, to evaluate her abscesses that have been drained. He said that he will review everything and when the time comes he will let us know what type of facility she should be released to. I asked if that was a split second decision; if they decide tomorrow do we have to be out the next day, and he said no. He said that more than likely what would happen is if one of the Long Term Acute Care places accept her and Dr. Soo can see nothing that would keep her in the hospital (blood pressure, heart rate, etc. stabilized) then they would discuss it with us and release her to that facility.
The PT person happened to be in the hallway when we were talking and I asked about PT. I asked if they would be working with mom everyday and the PT person said "no" only three times a week and they count the "sleeping" time as her being seen. She tried to explain that it is based on need, but I said that that would suggest that mom be seen everyday since her need was great. But that is not the case, they see the people that will be released in a few days every day, but those that will be here longer and will be released into long-term therapy are seen less. I argued the logic of this with her for a while but she was not budging. Hospital policy. [Just reading this over I think we forgot to tell you that mom was seen by PT and it did not go well, she could not even sit up on her own she just flopped back on the bed.]
I just tried to give mom some pills and she coughed a lot through the first few and then she chewed the second set (yuck). When I asked her if I should raise her head up so she could swallow better she said something about Karl telling her that "up" was better, then she said "smart boy, that Karl." I have a few more pills to give her but she is sleeping now and may do better when she wakes up.
The first to admit it
When Im wrong, Im wrong. And in this case I am ok being wrong. Once I got mommy back to sleep, she has been soundly doing so for about 3 hours now. We even turned, cleaned and got her vital signs without waking her up. Good thing? I don't know. I am going to look in to her pain medication dosages in the morning, but for now, sleep, sleep, sleep.
Thursday, December 27, 2007
It's Gonna be a LONNNNNNG night
I got here around 3:30 ish and mom slept soundly while Aunt Rita and I stared at each other for a good couple of hours. Right after she left mom started mumbling. She has been mumbling off and on for about 4.5 hours. She has recited her entire will (nope, I'm not tellin'), and has given all the info for the great grandbaby's Gerber insurance policies, including policy numbers. WHo knew she could be lucid without actually being lucid.
She has a pretty uneventful turn and wipe down, and as soon as I got her soundly sleeping again, they decided to bring in some meds. So once again she is mumbling and keeping both me and her room mate awake.
She has a pretty uneventful turn and wipe down, and as soon as I got her soundly sleeping again, they decided to bring in some meds. So once again she is mumbling and keeping both me and her room mate awake.
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Quick Like Molasses
A mere 12 hours after they told us that mom would be moving, she is in her new room. We are on the 7th floor and getting settled in. First, the 2nd floor nurses (let's call them the Jets) told us that mom would not have to move to a new bed, then they said that she would and they gave her some morphine before rolling her into the hall. Once on the 7th floor the nurses there (let's call them the Sharks) started a rumble in the hallway with the 2nd floor nurses who insisted that they had to bring their high-tech bed back down and she would have to be moved. The Shark nurse insisted that they only reason she agreed to the move this late at night was if she did not have to be moved to a new bed. In the end, they found a bed of equal or greater value in the hospital bed market and sent that back down with the Jet nurses and just slid mom into her spot in 702-1. Luckily, she slept through most of this. The nurse we have right now seems a bit stern, but she could just be having a long day. She asked if one of us was going to spend the night (oh yeah, Gretchen got here just in time to wait for another hour before the move happened) and I said that I was. She said she would look for a comfortable chair for me, but then she added "we don't usually allow anyone to spend the night, but we will allow it tonight." I am not sure how this will bode for tomorrow, but I will leave that fight for a stronger sister who has had more sleep than me.
Night Shift
Mom has had another busy day but she is still in the same physical place. A few doctors talked about her moving to another floor today, and Adrienne had her all packed up and ready to go at about 11am, but I am here now (7:30pm) and we are still packed and ready to go.
Mom had her wound changed but the PT people came while she was asleep and since that is what we like most of all, Adrienne did not let them disturb her. Right now she is telling the nurse that she wants to go for a walk, but until the PT people get her cleared I don't think that is going to happen. I know she is anxious to go to the bathroom on her own so there is not as much cleaning involved.
The surgeon has still not come down so we are still not sure about the cultures that were taken from her shoulder. But her white count is way down (around 9 last time I heard) so that is very good news.
She and I had a pretty rough night last night. She is dreaming like crazy and talks about them and/or through them. So every time I would setting into my comfy reclining chair she would start talking and I would sit up to listen and talk her through it. At least once in the night she thought she was at Aunt Mary's house and once she was sure she was home. There has been murder and intrigue in Kalamazoo but, all in all, the dreams seem to be good ones and we are very happy about that. I am hoping for more sleeping and less dreaming tonight.
Mom had her wound changed but the PT people came while she was asleep and since that is what we like most of all, Adrienne did not let them disturb her. Right now she is telling the nurse that she wants to go for a walk, but until the PT people get her cleared I don't think that is going to happen. I know she is anxious to go to the bathroom on her own so there is not as much cleaning involved.
The surgeon has still not come down so we are still not sure about the cultures that were taken from her shoulder. But her white count is way down (around 9 last time I heard) so that is very good news.
She and I had a pretty rough night last night. She is dreaming like crazy and talks about them and/or through them. So every time I would setting into my comfy reclining chair she would start talking and I would sit up to listen and talk her through it. At least once in the night she thought she was at Aunt Mary's house and once she was sure she was home. There has been murder and intrigue in Kalamazoo but, all in all, the dreams seem to be good ones and we are very happy about that. I am hoping for more sleeping and less dreaming tonight.
Hurry Up And Wait
When I arrived this morning we were told mom was going to be moved back upstairs to the Med Surg unit on the 5th floor. this is good news and we reveled in it. The tech came in about 1/2 hour later to help me pack everything up. That all happened before 10am. It is now after 5pm and we haven't moved yet. There isn't a bed available is the rumor on the street. Personally, I am ok here in the Intermediate Care. The rooms are brighter and seem to be a bit bigger than upstairs. For those that know mom well, know that she does not like to anticipate anything. You tell her something is going to happen she wants it to happen NOW. So her anxiety level has been high since no action has been taken. She didn't have a great night, so I have been treated to some rather delusional dream moments. Between a lack of sleep and morphine, we have been on motorcycles all over Canada today and even went to Denny's for a while. Oh yeah and we made cookies too. It has been quite a busy day. Good thing she is snoring now.
Snoring usually means sleep for most, but here at the hospital it means a doctor or nurse is due to come in and poke or prod.
Snoring usually means sleep for most, but here at the hospital it means a doctor or nurse is due to come in and poke or prod.
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Merry Christmas to All
We just had a very nice Christmas. Well, as nice as can be expected huddled around a hospital bed. The hospital actually had free meals in the cafeteria today, which was really nice since nothing else is open. I went home to sleep at around 10am and came back around 5:30pm. Mom was eating her dinner (she had some bites of roast beef, green beans, and mashed potatoes--yay!) so I ran down and got one of the free dinners from the cafeteria too. Adrienne, Gretchen, Gordon, and Megan were all here and we just sat around the room (I think Megan actually laid on the floor for awhile since there were only three chairs) and chatted. Mom drifted in and out and joined in the conversation occasionally (mostly making sense but sometimes referring to dream she just had). We read silly Christmas trivia questions and she was able to answer any questions that were answerable. At one point mom said that she would ask us to leave but she didn't want to miss anything. Just like old times. So everyone stayed a little while longer and then took off. Well, except me. I am settling in for the night. I think we scared the nurse that came on for the 7pm shift. She asked if we were all planning to stay. I am sure she was ready to point the way to the lounge, but we assured her that only one of us would be staying.
It has been a slow medical day since it is Christmas. I think Dr. Soo did come in while Adrienne was here so she will have to do a post to fill you all in on medical test results, etc. I know that mom's pain management is definitely better. When she reports on her pain it is usually around a 2 or 3 unless it is just about time for a shot of meds when it seems to be no higher than a 6. This is compared with the constant 10 and above while we were in the ICU those first few days. They are trying to rotate her every few hours to avoid bed sores and she complains but she complies. Which is all we really ask.
It has been a slow medical day since it is Christmas. I think Dr. Soo did come in while Adrienne was here so she will have to do a post to fill you all in on medical test results, etc. I know that mom's pain management is definitely better. When she reports on her pain it is usually around a 2 or 3 unless it is just about time for a shot of meds when it seems to be no higher than a 6. This is compared with the constant 10 and above while we were in the ICU those first few days. They are trying to rotate her every few hours to avoid bed sores and she complains but she complies. Which is all we really ask.
Monday, December 24, 2007
The Snore
In hotel rooms I dread it. I lay awake knowing that it is coming. I say, mommy, just let me go to sleep before you. She says, good luck with that. Hoooonnkkk!**
In a hospital room it is music to my ears. It means she is asleep. Truly and hopefully, deeply asleep. I wait for it and then I can finally doze off. I have been getting a few good snores today, but not nearly as many as I know she needs.
The roommate snores, but that doesn't count.
**I know Adrienne will tell you that I snored just as loudly as mom on our cruise last June, but, quite frankly, what does that have to do with anything.
In a hospital room it is music to my ears. It means she is asleep. Truly and hopefully, deeply asleep. I wait for it and then I can finally doze off. I have been getting a few good snores today, but not nearly as many as I know she needs.
The roommate snores, but that doesn't count.
**I know Adrienne will tell you that I snored just as loudly as mom on our cruise last June, but, quite frankly, what does that have to do with anything.
New Day -- New Daughter
OK, well maybe not new, just slightly used. I got here around 9am and mom was getting bath (so to speak) and she was not happy. At one point a bunch of people rushed into her room and Adrienne and I standing outside didn't know what was going on. Apparently, they were just reacting to her heart rate going up a little bit. Later, a doctor came by and told everyone not to get excited about her heart rate increasing he said that they have her on a couple of medications for that. Adrienne filled me in on as much as she could and then took off for a well deserved break.
The PT people (Stephanie and Nancy) came by and made mom move her arms and legs and got her into a sitting position in the bed. They told me she should be sitting up a few times a day for at least a half hour. Luckily, in about a half hour the nurse came by with some more morphine and I was able to lay her down and let her sleep. Of course, sleeping in a hospital is next to impossible. She asked me to put out the "Do Not Disturb" sign but I am sure they would not heed it even if I had it.
The PT people (Stephanie and Nancy) came by and made mom move her arms and legs and got her into a sitting position in the bed. They told me she should be sitting up a few times a day for at least a half hour. Luckily, in about a half hour the nurse came by with some more morphine and I was able to lay her down and let her sleep. Of course, sleeping in a hospital is next to impossible. She asked me to put out the "Do Not Disturb" sign but I am sure they would not heed it even if I had it.
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Dragon Slayer
Mom just underwent a "small" procedure. Right here in her room, the surgeon, Dr. Jacobs, lanced her right clavicle area that has been swollen and bothersome, and removed over 8cc's of puss. They say they froze it but mom says it hurt anyways. But she does notice a difference is the relief of pressure after they were finished. Dr. Soo (her initial surgeon from October) came in earlier this evening and drew some out for a culture, we should have the results of that by Monday. Hopefully that will give us a clue as to what this is and where it came from, whether it is related to the infection in her back or something else all together.
Other than that the only pain she has been complaining of is a headache.
BTW When this is all said and done, there will be a test of all Dr.'s names and responsibilities.
Other than that the only pain she has been complaining of is a headache.
BTW When this is all said and done, there will be a test of all Dr.'s names and responsibilities.
Still Going
Sorry for the long pause. Mom had a rough night last night with her heart rate being elevated again. As far as I know they still don't know what is causing that. She is also having terrible heartburn, so Gretchen asked for something (she knew the drugs name) and now they have that in her IV. But she also has Tums handy in case she ever needs them.
She is eating good now that we can fill out her menu for her and we don't have to just wait and see what they bring us. She went for a CT scan and something else today but they don't have any results from that yet.
Adrienne is looking into a few more rehabs today and then Gretchen is heading back up north. Tomorrow will be a long day for Adrienne but then I will be there again Monday to provide some relief. Then Gretchen, Megan, and Gordon are coming back on Tuesday so maybe we will have a little mini Christmas at the hospital. I don't think we can sneak her out for this one. (We did that one time when we were younger and mom was in the hospital on Easter. We brought her some clothes and snuck her down a back stairway.)
EZ
She is eating good now that we can fill out her menu for her and we don't have to just wait and see what they bring us. She went for a CT scan and something else today but they don't have any results from that yet.
Adrienne is looking into a few more rehabs today and then Gretchen is heading back up north. Tomorrow will be a long day for Adrienne but then I will be there again Monday to provide some relief. Then Gretchen, Megan, and Gordon are coming back on Tuesday so maybe we will have a little mini Christmas at the hospital. I don't think we can sneak her out for this one. (We did that one time when we were younger and mom was in the hospital on Easter. We brought her some clothes and snuck her down a back stairway.)
EZ
Friday, December 21, 2007
All Clear
The cardiologist was just here and has given the all clear for mom to beign Physical therapy. She too is ready and willing for it to happen. I reminded her that her goal is to get well and be ready for our amazing cruise at the end of April.
She is no longer residing in ICU, she has been moved to Intermidiate Care. Kind of a step between ICU and the regular floor. The room is small but the care is good. She is looking forward to dinner, but a little remiss that Gordon won't be here for it, because she ordered her meal with him in mind. She one thing for herself and the rest thinking he would eat it.
Gretchen and Gordon have gone home to rest up for tonight's night shift.
I spent my day looking at Rehabilitation Centers. I have visited about 6 so far and have 2 more on my list for tomorrow. Our 2 main questions are "Can I stay with her? and Do you have readily available internet access, preferably in the rooms?" If the answer to the first is "no" then I don't bother to even visit that place. So far, most have been receptive, making sure I realize it means sleeping in a chair. I am ok with that. I have a top 2 right now, Botsford Commons and Oakland Nursing Center. The Botsford is run by the same Medical Group that mom belong to and her regular Internal medicine Dr. is the Medical Director. So that gives it a plus one point. The Oakland one is on the same campus as Providence Hospital and moms Surgical Dr.'s. So that is one point for it. I don't want to make a decisive, we can only go here! I want to make sure we have choices in case one or the other is not avaiable when we need it. I was optimistic back in October, that I could do everything on y own, but I am realistic this time, to knwo that I can't. But I will be with ehr every step of the way ('cept maybe when I go home to shower).
Sleep seems to be the best medicine right now, but it is a commodity that is hard to come by. Mom's new roommate does not like having her oxygen mask on and everytime she tries to take it off a loud alarm goes off, disturbing mom's rest. Then she (the roomate) raised a little stink with the Lab people who came to draw her blood and the nurse had to intervene. Shortly after that someone came in to do mom's vitals and had to run out for a "code blue" Never a dull moment here.
I hear even breathing, so it is back to reading our books for Aunt Rita and I.
Adrienne
She is no longer residing in ICU, she has been moved to Intermidiate Care. Kind of a step between ICU and the regular floor. The room is small but the care is good. She is looking forward to dinner, but a little remiss that Gordon won't be here for it, because she ordered her meal with him in mind. She one thing for herself and the rest thinking he would eat it.
Gretchen and Gordon have gone home to rest up for tonight's night shift.
I spent my day looking at Rehabilitation Centers. I have visited about 6 so far and have 2 more on my list for tomorrow. Our 2 main questions are "Can I stay with her? and Do you have readily available internet access, preferably in the rooms?" If the answer to the first is "no" then I don't bother to even visit that place. So far, most have been receptive, making sure I realize it means sleeping in a chair. I am ok with that. I have a top 2 right now, Botsford Commons and Oakland Nursing Center. The Botsford is run by the same Medical Group that mom belong to and her regular Internal medicine Dr. is the Medical Director. So that gives it a plus one point. The Oakland one is on the same campus as Providence Hospital and moms Surgical Dr.'s. So that is one point for it. I don't want to make a decisive, we can only go here! I want to make sure we have choices in case one or the other is not avaiable when we need it. I was optimistic back in October, that I could do everything on y own, but I am realistic this time, to knwo that I can't. But I will be with ehr every step of the way ('cept maybe when I go home to shower).
Sleep seems to be the best medicine right now, but it is a commodity that is hard to come by. Mom's new roommate does not like having her oxygen mask on and everytime she tries to take it off a loud alarm goes off, disturbing mom's rest. Then she (the roomate) raised a little stink with the Lab people who came to draw her blood and the nurse had to intervene. Shortly after that someone came in to do mom's vitals and had to run out for a "code blue" Never a dull moment here.
I hear even breathing, so it is back to reading our books for Aunt Rita and I.
Adrienne
Goodnight
We had a really good night. She got a full sponge bath and linen change about 1:00 this morning, and the nurse tech that we have (Chris) not only had everything he needed right there but had things stacked in the order that they were going to be needed. Mom was very impressed, it helped that he was strong and could turn her in one "oomph".
We've talked alot about what's been going on and why she is here. The nurse mentioned that she had stitches in her neck, which came as a total shock to mom. So I explained what had happened, and she told me what she thought had happened. Things make little more sense.
Her breakfast was still liquid, they have ordered a new one, but in the meantime Gordon and I are picking her up a few things from the cafeteria.
We've talked alot about what's been going on and why she is here. The nurse mentioned that she had stitches in her neck, which came as a total shock to mom. So I explained what had happened, and she told me what she thought had happened. Things make little more sense.
Her breakfast was still liquid, they have ordered a new one, but in the meantime Gordon and I are picking her up a few things from the cafeteria.
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Domestication Is Not My Strong Suit
This is Gretchen:
We are still in ICU. I took over for Adrienne around 1:00. The nurse asked that I move our set up to the other side of the room. I moved the chairs around but many people know that I suck at arranging the furniture. I did create a cooler in a wash basin so we can keep her drinks (OJ, V8, milk, ensure) ice cold. She ate a little bit of banana pudding earlier and the dinner they brought was still full liquid. She is now on soft foods, her nurse had told her there was always extra trays and to let her know when the tray came and she would get one with mashed potatoes. Mom was really looking forward to those mashed potatoes. Of course, today there were no extra trays. So I went down to the cafeteria (I think it may technically be in another county) and got some mashed potatoes, good thing today's dinner was meatloaf. Now that I came back with the potatoes she is asleep for the first time since I've been here. I'm not waking her up.
On the medical side she had all of her tests today, I'm not sure of the others but the White Blood Count scan was very painful for her, they had to roll her on her sides and got her foot stuck between tables. I spoke with the cardiologist who said that they believe her elevated heart rate is from electrolyte imbalance. They are hoping that regulating these will bring her heartrate back to normal. She is pretty steady at normal now but they still have her on the cardizem IV. They will be puttinng her on cardizem orally once the pharmacy fills the order The echocardiogram showed that her heart was strong, They finally changed the original wound that they had placed a wound vac in when they reopened it, the vac had not been working since they put a brand new one on yesterday. I'll fill Adrienne in on the gory details but it was very interesting to watch.
Her spirits have improved tremendously and she is completely coherent. She is tired of hearng "I'm sorry" everytime someone hurts her, whether it be accidently putting things down on her feet or intentionally rolliing her on her side. "Put your sorries in a sack" has been heard more than once today. She would also like to know why they always put the a"stuff" so far away. Someone will come in and start something only to have to go get "stuff", this always takes much longer than the second they said they would be gone.
When being assessed by her new nurse prior to transport for her test she was asked most of the usual questions including "why are you here?" she replied that originally she had surgery on her back, when asked why she was here this time she said "because everything hurts and nothing works" we're working on reversing that.
We are still in ICU. I took over for Adrienne around 1:00. The nurse asked that I move our set up to the other side of the room. I moved the chairs around but many people know that I suck at arranging the furniture. I did create a cooler in a wash basin so we can keep her drinks (OJ, V8, milk, ensure) ice cold. She ate a little bit of banana pudding earlier and the dinner they brought was still full liquid. She is now on soft foods, her nurse had told her there was always extra trays and to let her know when the tray came and she would get one with mashed potatoes. Mom was really looking forward to those mashed potatoes. Of course, today there were no extra trays. So I went down to the cafeteria (I think it may technically be in another county) and got some mashed potatoes, good thing today's dinner was meatloaf. Now that I came back with the potatoes she is asleep for the first time since I've been here. I'm not waking her up.
On the medical side she had all of her tests today, I'm not sure of the others but the White Blood Count scan was very painful for her, they had to roll her on her sides and got her foot stuck between tables. I spoke with the cardiologist who said that they believe her elevated heart rate is from electrolyte imbalance. They are hoping that regulating these will bring her heartrate back to normal. She is pretty steady at normal now but they still have her on the cardizem IV. They will be puttinng her on cardizem orally once the pharmacy fills the order The echocardiogram showed that her heart was strong, They finally changed the original wound that they had placed a wound vac in when they reopened it, the vac had not been working since they put a brand new one on yesterday. I'll fill Adrienne in on the gory details but it was very interesting to watch.
Her spirits have improved tremendously and she is completely coherent. She is tired of hearng "I'm sorry" everytime someone hurts her, whether it be accidently putting things down on her feet or intentionally rolliing her on her side. "Put your sorries in a sack" has been heard more than once today. She would also like to know why they always put the a"stuff" so far away. Someone will come in and start something only to have to go get "stuff", this always takes much longer than the second they said they would be gone.
When being assessed by her new nurse prior to transport for her test she was asked most of the usual questions including "why are you here?" she replied that originally she had surgery on her back, when asked why she was here this time she said "because everything hurts and nothing works" we're working on reversing that.
Testing Testing, 1 2 3...
Mom has had at least 3 major tests done within the last 24 hours, and more are yet to come. Yesterday was an echocardiogram, today was an in bed x-ray, an ultrasound (that required the drinking of a bunch of "crap" - her words), and also a CT Scan. Besides the normal draw of blood every morning to get her White Blood Cells Tested. She has been a very busy woman today and I expect her to be fitfully exhausted when she returns to her room.
She has been upgraded from "full liquids", to softs for her diet. That should make her happy. Except today's lunch is lasagna and that is not on her favorites list. But I did get her to drink a little V8 and milk and orange juice this morning in between doses of "crap".
Hopefully all tests will be conclusive at the very least, and resolutely positive as well.
Posted by Adrienne
She has been upgraded from "full liquids", to softs for her diet. That should make her happy. Except today's lunch is lasagna and that is not on her favorites list. But I did get her to drink a little V8 and milk and orange juice this morning in between doses of "crap".
Hopefully all tests will be conclusive at the very least, and resolutely positive as well.
Posted by Adrienne
Overnight
Adrienne sent us an email at around 4:30am. She said that Mom slept pretty much the whole time she has been there (since 11:30pm). She did have to be cleaned and turned, and was very cooperative and didnt "scream" once the entire time.
She is worried about not walking again, but she can actually move her legs fairly well. She was concerned that she couldn't lift them, and Adrienne explained that they were very swollen and very heavy right now. Mom suggested that maybe she was drinking too much water and retaining or maybe she should wear the compression things again. Adrienne explained the amount of pain those put her in at the time and said that we chose to take them off of her. They decided to ask the doctors for some support hose in the morning. She drank some orange juice and mentioned being hungry, so I think that is a good sign. She tried raising her arms above her head, just to see if she could. Her right arm went all the way but her left went halfway. She also has a line on her left so that could be a factor. She has not complained to Adrienne of any pain all night.
She is worried about not walking again, but she can actually move her legs fairly well. She was concerned that she couldn't lift them, and Adrienne explained that they were very swollen and very heavy right now. Mom suggested that maybe she was drinking too much water and retaining or maybe she should wear the compression things again. Adrienne explained the amount of pain those put her in at the time and said that we chose to take them off of her. They decided to ask the doctors for some support hose in the morning. She drank some orange juice and mentioned being hungry, so I think that is a good sign. She tried raising her arms above her head, just to see if she could. Her right arm went all the way but her left went halfway. She also has a line on her left so that could be a factor. She has not complained to Adrienne of any pain all night.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Sweet Time
We have had some really terrific nurses at Providence and we have had some real duds. This afternoon's nurse was a dud. As mom put it herself, according to Gretchen, she takes her own sweet time.
Gretch called me around 6:30 and said that they were ready to move mom to the ICU. At aroung 8pm she called back and said she just got there. Aaargh! But she is set now and she took some potassium pills and she had some put into her IV so hopefully her heart rate will come down and she will have a restful night. I wish the same for all of you.
BTW Adrienne had the brilliant idea to bring the EZ Christmas CD to the hospital and she was playing it for mom earlier through the laptop. It is a nice way for me to be there while I can't be there.
Gretch called me around 6:30 and said that they were ready to move mom to the ICU. At aroung 8pm she called back and said she just got there. Aaargh! But she is set now and she took some potassium pills and she had some put into her IV so hopefully her heart rate will come down and she will have a restful night. I wish the same for all of you.
BTW Adrienne had the brilliant idea to bring the EZ Christmas CD to the hospital and she was playing it for mom earlier through the laptop. It is a nice way for me to be there while I can't be there.
Old Digs
Well, sorry to everyone who was so encouraged by mom's move out of ICU (I was never encouraged because I didn't see the improvement), but she is going back. Her heart rate has been elevated and they can't get it to go down. They think it is a potassium deficiency but mom threw up the liquid potassium they gave her. They will try again with a pill, but after that it will go into her IV line. But with it going in through an IV it could take up to 5 hours to absorb (I really don't understand these things. Some drugs they say absorb quicker through the IV).
Either way they are planning to move her back down to ICU for at least the night. I certainly hope our favorite nurse is on duty. That will make for an easier night. For us at least.
Either way they are planning to move her back down to ICU for at least the night. I certainly hope our favorite nurse is on duty. That will make for an easier night. For us at least.
Update
I talked to Gretchen this morning just after I started driving back to Indiana. Mom had a rough night with very little sleeping. Everytime she would drift off into a deep sleep the nurse would be there to do something. Gretchen tried very hard to coordinate the care so that everything would happen at once and then she could sleep, but the nurse was not terribly on the ball and could get that whole coordination thing down. Oh yeah, and she made Gretchen sing (mom, not the nurse). She has been asking me to sing and I, of course, am happy to do it. Gretchen tried to explain that she is not the singing daughter, but mom insisted so Gretch sand "Angels We Have Heard On High" over and over and over. That is love.
Gretch said that mom did eat a little bit this morning. About half a pudding and some milk. I think when she is more coherent she is refusing food, but then she forgets later and eats. We did that with some pills the other day. The nurse brought in some pills and mom was refusing to take them. Then she closed her eyes for 10 seconds and when she opened them I said "are you ready for your pills?" and she shook her head yes. Jeannette went home around 8am and Adrienne got there soon after so that Gretchen could go to work for a few hours.
I hate being gone, but I know we have plenty of people willing to help, so my job is going to be setting up a spreadsheet to make sure that my sisters can get meals and some sleep ocassionally.
Adrienne just called and said that they are talking about releasing mom on Friday and if she is not ready on Friday, then on Monday since they don't like transporting on the weekend. Adrienne will be looking at some rehab centers in the next few days and we trust that she will find the perfect one.
Thank you all for your comments. It really does help to receive them, even if it is just to say that you are still thinking of us. It is encouraging to know how many people are checking these updates because they love mom. We know we have a great support system, but it is always nice to get the comments to confirm it.
Gretch said that mom did eat a little bit this morning. About half a pudding and some milk. I think when she is more coherent she is refusing food, but then she forgets later and eats. We did that with some pills the other day. The nurse brought in some pills and mom was refusing to take them. Then she closed her eyes for 10 seconds and when she opened them I said "are you ready for your pills?" and she shook her head yes. Jeannette went home around 8am and Adrienne got there soon after so that Gretchen could go to work for a few hours.
I hate being gone, but I know we have plenty of people willing to help, so my job is going to be setting up a spreadsheet to make sure that my sisters can get meals and some sleep ocassionally.
Adrienne just called and said that they are talking about releasing mom on Friday and if she is not ready on Friday, then on Monday since they don't like transporting on the weekend. Adrienne will be looking at some rehab centers in the next few days and we trust that she will find the perfect one.
Thank you all for your comments. It really does help to receive them, even if it is just to say that you are still thinking of us. It is encouraging to know how many people are checking these updates because they love mom. We know we have a great support system, but it is always nice to get the comments to confirm it.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
New Digs
Mom was moved from the ICU to the surgical recovery floor today. The doctors and nurses say she is getting better but she just doesn't care. She created enough of a scene today screaming that she wanted to die and asking us for her pills (even accusing us of hiding her pills) that the nurse manager has put her on suicide watch and we will have an extra "sitter" in the room with us tonight to make sure that she does not harm herself and that we do not harm her. We can't blame them.
The room is smaller and it is a double so mom's poor roommate is having to listen to her ranting right now. She has recieved more morphine and she is resting now and I hope mom has a peaceful night. Aunt Rita, Jeannette, and Gordon are all in there now so she is well taken care of.
Adrienne is going to go home soon and sleep until morning. They she will be checking out a few rehabs centers in case that option is recommended to us by the doctors. Gretchen and Jeannette will be staying tonight and I will be heading back to mom's to sleep for a while and then I will be driving back to Indiana. I feel like I am deserting, but I know I have to go. I will be talking to the sisters here as often as I am now so I will keep this up as much as I can.
My plan is to work for a few days, have Jackson's birthday party on Sunday night and then head back up here on Monday in order to give Gretchen and Adrienne a break.
The room is smaller and it is a double so mom's poor roommate is having to listen to her ranting right now. She has recieved more morphine and she is resting now and I hope mom has a peaceful night. Aunt Rita, Jeannette, and Gordon are all in there now so she is well taken care of.
Adrienne is going to go home soon and sleep until morning. They she will be checking out a few rehabs centers in case that option is recommended to us by the doctors. Gretchen and Jeannette will be staying tonight and I will be heading back to mom's to sleep for a while and then I will be driving back to Indiana. I feel like I am deserting, but I know I have to go. I will be talking to the sisters here as often as I am now so I will keep this up as much as I can.
My plan is to work for a few days, have Jackson's birthday party on Sunday night and then head back up here on Monday in order to give Gretchen and Adrienne a break.
Coherenter
I have been here so long I can totally make up words and no one will care. Mom has had a busy morning. The nurse on at 6am offered to get her cleaned up and she screamed "no, no, no" except with a lot more nos. Our favorite nurse, Cheryl, came on at 7am said OK, you girls need to leave we are going to get your mom cleaned up. So we went for breakfast and mom got a sponge bath. She looks better.
She has also been slightly more coherent and has made it very clear that she is very angry. She is angry at the doctors for doing this to her and she is angry at us for letting them. I know we can take it, but the doctor's are wooses. Actually, one of the surgeons was here this morning and he took it pretty well. He was impressed that she could express her anger so clearly and that she could move both of her feet and lifted her legs off of the bed.
The doctors have also told us that her vitals have stabalized and she will be moved up the regular surgical floor (out of ICU) as soon as a bed is available. This is not terribly good news for us since we get pretty close attention from the staff down here and there is room for more than one of us in the room.
Right now she is asking to sleep and then sleep some more. She had a few bites of ice cream (I told you we liked this nurse) but when I asked if she wanted more when she woke up a few minutes ago she answered "I want to die." So it is more coherent but the song is the same.
She has also been slightly more coherent and has made it very clear that she is very angry. She is angry at the doctors for doing this to her and she is angry at us for letting them. I know we can take it, but the doctor's are wooses. Actually, one of the surgeons was here this morning and he took it pretty well. He was impressed that she could express her anger so clearly and that she could move both of her feet and lifted her legs off of the bed.
The doctors have also told us that her vitals have stabalized and she will be moved up the regular surgical floor (out of ICU) as soon as a bed is available. This is not terribly good news for us since we get pretty close attention from the staff down here and there is room for more than one of us in the room.
Right now she is asking to sleep and then sleep some more. She had a few bites of ice cream (I told you we liked this nurse) but when I asked if she wanted more when she woke up a few minutes ago she answered "I want to die." So it is more coherent but the song is the same.
Praying People
Anyone who knows me well knows that I don't pray. But everyone will also know that I will do absolutely anything to comfort my mommy. We have all said more Hail Mary's in the last few days than I am sure we have ever said in our whole catholic lives. Mom will wake up and start the prayer but always in the middle "Holy Mary, Mother of God..." and then we will start from the beginning and say it until she falls back to sleep. Once when I was alone with her she asked me to pray so I started "Hail Mary..." But she said "no, start it!" After a few frustrating moments I realized that she wanted me to start at the end just like she does. Is this something from her childhood?
We have done other parts of the rosary too and you can definitely tell that she is reliving her speed praying days from St. Gabes. I could hardly keep up.
Tonight, she said to pray with her and I did, but then as she was calming down I told her that a lot of people were praying for her and I started to list them. She just listened quietly (and quietly is exactly what we are going for these days). I started with the Aunts and Uncles and it was working so well that I moved down to the cousins and second cousins until she fell asleep. I know that she appreciates all of your thoughts and prayers so don't make a liar out of me.
We have done other parts of the rosary too and you can definitely tell that she is reliving her speed praying days from St. Gabes. I could hardly keep up.
Tonight, she said to pray with her and I did, but then as she was calming down I told her that a lot of people were praying for her and I started to list them. She just listened quietly (and quietly is exactly what we are going for these days). I started with the Aunts and Uncles and it was working so well that I moved down to the cousins and second cousins until she fell asleep. I know that she appreciates all of your thoughts and prayers so don't make a liar out of me.
Monday, December 17, 2007
Update
Mom had some pretty bad moments today but right now she is resting relatively comfortably. She had her dressings changed this morning and the doctors said that the wounds looked good. That gives us a lot less comfort this time around since we heard that right up until the moment the massive infection was found deep inside the first one.
She has had some apple juice, some orange juice, and some ginger-ale which produced some pretty amazing burbs and helped relieve a lot of pressure in her belly. She even ate a little bit of broth for dinner. She had her head raised pretty high in the bed and she rested in that position for a while, but every position ends in pain which does not seem to be getting better. We are maintaining her constant ice chip and water diet, but she seems to be tiring of those too.
Adrienne and I each got home to rest for a little while today and Gretchen and Gordon were just here and we were able to go to dinner. They just left and we will be hunkering down for the night soon.
I know I didn't post much today, but nothing felt momentus enough to feel the need to fill people in, but I know everyone is anxious for any news so I will try to do better tomorrow. I read Aunt Monica's comment about crying everytime she reads and update and I can relate since I am usually crying when I write them. Although we try very hard not to cry in the room with mommy, the bathrooms here have seen their fair share of tears.
She has had some apple juice, some orange juice, and some ginger-ale which produced some pretty amazing burbs and helped relieve a lot of pressure in her belly. She even ate a little bit of broth for dinner. She had her head raised pretty high in the bed and she rested in that position for a while, but every position ends in pain which does not seem to be getting better. We are maintaining her constant ice chip and water diet, but she seems to be tiring of those too.
Adrienne and I each got home to rest for a little while today and Gretchen and Gordon were just here and we were able to go to dinner. They just left and we will be hunkering down for the night soon.
I know I didn't post much today, but nothing felt momentus enough to feel the need to fill people in, but I know everyone is anxious for any news so I will try to do better tomorrow. I read Aunt Monica's comment about crying everytime she reads and update and I can relate since I am usually crying when I write them. Although we try very hard not to cry in the room with mommy, the bathrooms here have seen their fair share of tears.
I can't even come up with a title. Gretchen went home last night so that she could go to work this morning. She is planning on taking the end of the week off so that I can go home and we will still be double-teaming mom's care. Mom did not get much sleep last night, so Adrienne and I didn't get much sleep either. She woke up every few minutes to groan and moan and basically to find out that she was still alive and be pissed off. She did switch to telling us that she loves us, but we knew that even when she hated us. I went to a lounge to sleep for a few hours at around 4am and when I came back she had been given a shot of valium. So I sent Adrienne off to sleep and mom actually slept (fitfully, but slept) for almost 2 hours. I was actually rejoicing at 10 minutes. She slept 10 minutes! I will have to remember to tell Adrienne. But when she kept going I propped my head in my hands and I slept a little bit too.
This morning the torture began anew. They came in with a portable x-ray machine and attempted to slide a large plate behind her back. Her back that just had two major surgeries on it a few days ago. She was screaming, we demanded that he stop. He was very surprised to see that we were absolutely serious. When the doctor came they said they had to clean out her wounds. The surgeon showed up and we explained to him that pain management was the most important thing. Period. He listened to mom screaming that she wanted to die for a little while and we chatted about that and when it started, etc. He promised that they would give her all of the pain meds they could before they rolled her over to check her wounds. I have learned my limits and I knew I had to leave. Adrienne decided to stay but she just called and she said they wouldn't let her. So she is waiting in the lounge and I am going to bring her some breakfast.
That's where we are.
This morning the torture began anew. They came in with a portable x-ray machine and attempted to slide a large plate behind her back. Her back that just had two major surgeries on it a few days ago. She was screaming, we demanded that he stop. He was very surprised to see that we were absolutely serious. When the doctor came they said they had to clean out her wounds. The surgeon showed up and we explained to him that pain management was the most important thing. Period. He listened to mom screaming that she wanted to die for a little while and we chatted about that and when it started, etc. He promised that they would give her all of the pain meds they could before they rolled her over to check her wounds. I have learned my limits and I knew I had to leave. Adrienne decided to stay but she just called and she said they wouldn't let her. So she is waiting in the lounge and I am going to bring her some breakfast.
That's where we are.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
No Good News
It has been a long day and it is going to be an even longer night. Mom is awake and she is not handling any of this very well. She was furious to have a breathing tube in and at around 4pm it was taken out. While she feels more comfortable with this development, she is by no means comfortable. She is very uncomfortable and she is in a lot of pain. She has a self-controlled drip now (dilaudin) but the nurse said that until it builds up it will not help a whole lot. She is very unhappy and unless her pain situation improves I don't see that changing any time soon. We had a lot of people here today, Melody, Jon, Lynn, Megan, Steph, Arnold, Robin, Gordon, and Aunt Rita along with Gretchen, Adrienne, and I. I expect we three girls will spend the night in her room since she is not sleeping at all and needs much attention (mostly in the form of ice chips on demand). Gordon is camped out in the lounge. I just slept in a darkened un-used lounge for about an hour but I can't seem to talk my sisters into taking even that short of a break.
I really, really, hoped I have better news tomorrow.
I really, really, hoped I have better news tomorrow.
Saturday, December 15, 2007
ICU
Mom is in her recovery room in the Neurosurgery Intensive Care Unit. The rule back here is that we can stay with her but they don't want us sleeping back here. She has a big room all to herself and there is a pretty comfy chair, but we will try to stick to the rules. Right now Adrienne is in the lounge, where we have comandeered the two reclining chairs and I am in with mom. When we first came back she was in a semi-sleep state. She kept waking up and becoming agitated. She would try to talk (she can't because of the ventilator) and to lift her hands (she can't because they have restraints on her--to keep her from taking out the ventilator), but we have been able to calm her down by talking to her and stroking her forehead.
So, we will take turns for the rest of the night. With one of us trying to sleep in the lounge while the other keeps vigil. Gretchen will come again in the morning and we will let her be the one to tell her everything that went on in her surgery. She is not going to be happy. Her pain was to the point where she was sorry that she had the first surgery, she is not going to be encouraged that she just had a second, just like the first, which didn't go so well.
Anyway, all of the doctors we have spoken to are encouraging, so we soak up encouragement from them like sponges so that we can try to pass it on to mom when she wakes up. I suggested just keeping her asleep until she is all healed and ready to run out of her on her own, but no one else thought that was a good idea.
So, we will take turns for the rest of the night. With one of us trying to sleep in the lounge while the other keeps vigil. Gretchen will come again in the morning and we will let her be the one to tell her everything that went on in her surgery. She is not going to be happy. Her pain was to the point where she was sorry that she had the first surgery, she is not going to be encouraged that she just had a second, just like the first, which didn't go so well.
Anyway, all of the doctors we have spoken to are encouraging, so we soak up encouragement from them like sponges so that we can try to pass it on to mom when she wakes up. I suggested just keeping her asleep until she is all healed and ready to run out of her on her own, but no one else thought that was a good idea.
Quick Results
The surgeon just came back and told us the this part of the surgery went exactly as he had expected. He re-opened the wound and pull out as much of the infection as they could and then they hooked her up to a medi-vac. This is a vacuum system that she will keep on for at least a few days perhaps a week or more that will keep sucking up any moisture and infection. The doctor expects her to remain in the hospital for 4 to 5 days. Then special home care will be arranged to change the vacuum thingy and do more of the same on the new surgery site.
She still has an oxegyn tube down her throat and they plan to keep her asleep for the rest of the night. Adrienne and I will be allowed to go in once an hour so we will be staying.
She still has an oxegyn tube down her throat and they plan to keep her asleep for the rest of the night. Adrienne and I will be allowed to go in once an hour so we will be staying.
Starting Line
Well, we are back at the starting line and we are in for the long haul.
The surgeon came out to talk to us at around 6:30 (about 5 hours into a 2 hour surgery). He was very nice, but he told us it was much worse than they ever imagined. She had an infection from the top of her neck to the middle of her back. He spent the entire time scraping away bone until he could find no more pus in the upper part of her back. He ended up doing a laminectomy fusion on her upper back. The same thing that she had on her lower back in late October. The same thing that she is still recovering from. So we are starting over.
Except we are further back than before since she has not healed completely from the first one. In fact, when the doctor talked to us he had not even touched the original wound yet. That was what was supposed to take two hours, the flushing out of the original wound to get rid of any infection and the abcesses. He told us that he was going to go back in to the OR and start that in about 45 minutes and it should take about two hours. We promised ourselves that we wouldn't start jumping whenever we saw someone heading this way until around 9pm, but we have already broken that promise about 6 times.
Adrienne and I just went out to Wendy's to grab a bite since we knew it would be awhile, but we are back in the waiting room. A waiting room we have had all to ourselves most of the day. If only there was something decent on TV on a Saturday night.
The surgeon came out to talk to us at around 6:30 (about 5 hours into a 2 hour surgery). He was very nice, but he told us it was much worse than they ever imagined. She had an infection from the top of her neck to the middle of her back. He spent the entire time scraping away bone until he could find no more pus in the upper part of her back. He ended up doing a laminectomy fusion on her upper back. The same thing that she had on her lower back in late October. The same thing that she is still recovering from. So we are starting over.
Except we are further back than before since she has not healed completely from the first one. In fact, when the doctor talked to us he had not even touched the original wound yet. That was what was supposed to take two hours, the flushing out of the original wound to get rid of any infection and the abcesses. He told us that he was going to go back in to the OR and start that in about 45 minutes and it should take about two hours. We promised ourselves that we wouldn't start jumping whenever we saw someone heading this way until around 9pm, but we have already broken that promise about 6 times.
Adrienne and I just went out to Wendy's to grab a bite since we knew it would be awhile, but we are back in the waiting room. A waiting room we have had all to ourselves most of the day. If only there was something decent on TV on a Saturday night.
A Few Steps Back -- EZ
Well, mom has taken a few steps back since I was last here. As most of you know, she went to the emergency room on Thursday night. They assumed all of her problems had to do with over-medication and they sent her home. Everyone came over on Friday afternoon, Melody and Jon and Baby Lynn are in town and we had a nice spaghetti dinner. Mom was a little out of it, but she was functioning except that she could not put any weight at all on her feet. Jackson and I had to take off at around 6:30pm to go visit some friends in Chelsea and to spend the night there. When the Westbranch crew was ready to go, Gretchen offered to stay with Adrienne and Adrienne quickly took her up on the offer. None of them slept much because mom was in a lot of pain and at around 5am she could not move her legs and she actually requested to go to the hospital. So Adrienne called an ambulance and then called me. I disentangled myself from Jackson and met them all at Garden City Hospital. When they got there they were told by the staff that there was a major infection and some major discharge from the wound. Keep in mind that this is the hospital that declared her fine just the night before. Adrienne imediately called Dr. Soo and was told to get a private ambulance and to get mom to Providence hospital. There was a general consensus that she would need surgery to clean up the infection in the wound. She was in a lot of pain and the drugs they were giving did not help. Her mouth was incredibly dry, but with surgery on the horizon, no water or ice could be ingested.
Anyway, we got her to Providence and we got some good people to look at her and we finally made them understand that the pain was in her feet and she could not move her legs. They ordered an MRI and explained to us that there were some internal infected absesses that were pressing on her spinal cord. That is why the wound looked OK from the outside, but there was a river of discharge at the hospital when one of the absess burst. After they got the MRI done (a very painful process for mom) they had her in surgery in about a half hour (1pm). As soon as she went in Adrienne and I headed home so she could shower. She is on her way back and I am just waiting for some laundry to finish. I left all of my clothes in the suitcase with Jackson's. Lyle ended up taking him to see his Great Grandma since that was the original plan and then he took her down to Ohio to stay with him mom. I will pick him up tomorrow and then head home.
We will post more when we know more.
Anyway, we got her to Providence and we got some good people to look at her and we finally made them understand that the pain was in her feet and she could not move her legs. They ordered an MRI and explained to us that there were some internal infected absesses that were pressing on her spinal cord. That is why the wound looked OK from the outside, but there was a river of discharge at the hospital when one of the absess burst. After they got the MRI done (a very painful process for mom) they had her in surgery in about a half hour (1pm). As soon as she went in Adrienne and I headed home so she could shower. She is on her way back and I am just waiting for some laundry to finish. I left all of my clothes in the suitcase with Jackson's. Lyle ended up taking him to see his Great Grandma since that was the original plan and then he took her down to Ohio to stay with him mom. I will pick him up tomorrow and then head home.
We will post more when we know more.
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
Am I better, am I worse?
It is the best of times, it is the worst of times
I don't have good and bad days I have good and bad hours.
I was alone most of the day yesterday as I am today. Gretchen is the daughter in charge and she has a real job with real hours.
Yesterday morning she changed my dressing before work and put me back down for a nap. About 10 I felt good enough to want to get up, even got dressed and was going to have something to eat. Rita happened to be on her way in while I was getting up so we visited for a while. I had some lunch, the nurse came at 3 and changed me again and I decided to lie down again. A pretty good day.
By 4:15, I was crying like a baby. The kind of cry that required sobs and gasps between breaths.. I was crying because of great pain. I could ring the bell and no one would come. I could call out a name and no one would come. I had to get out of bed and get my own pills if I wanted some relief (I have since learned to keep a supply by my bed - but too late smart) It took almost an hour (with all the crying going on) to get out of bed and get to the pills (which were a recent refill and in an impossible to open cap), get the pills down my, get back to the bed and for the crying to subside.
That's how I am.
I don't have good and bad days I have good and bad hours.
I was alone most of the day yesterday as I am today. Gretchen is the daughter in charge and she has a real job with real hours.
Yesterday morning she changed my dressing before work and put me back down for a nap. About 10 I felt good enough to want to get up, even got dressed and was going to have something to eat. Rita happened to be on her way in while I was getting up so we visited for a while. I had some lunch, the nurse came at 3 and changed me again and I decided to lie down again. A pretty good day.
By 4:15, I was crying like a baby. The kind of cry that required sobs and gasps between breaths.. I was crying because of great pain. I could ring the bell and no one would come. I could call out a name and no one would come. I had to get out of bed and get my own pills if I wanted some relief (I have since learned to keep a supply by my bed - but too late smart) It took almost an hour (with all the crying going on) to get out of bed and get to the pills (which were a recent refill and in an impossible to open cap), get the pills down my, get back to the bed and for the crying to subside.
That's how I am.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)