I dreamed that someone was chasing me with a 2 x 4. They caught me. It was that little green guy from the Ben Gay ads in the funnies years ago. I opened my eyes. My back was throbbing. BOOM boom, BOOM boom. It was throbbing in direct correlation to my breathing. BOOM boom, in; BOOM boom, out; BOOM boom, in; BOOM boom, BOOM, boom. I looked at the clock. It was two and one half hours since I had taken a pain pill. What was I going to do for the next three and a half hours till I could have another one.
While I was contemplating this, someone drove a nail into my left ankle. It really hurt and I tensed up. My right foot took that tensing motion as an invitation to cramp and my toes started to curl down. I quickly sat on the side on the bed to place my foot flat on the floor to stop the curling process. Another 15 minutes had gone by.
As I sat up I said "Hello, there" to the new pains. The rib cage that wouldn't let me take a deep breath. The neck and shoulder pain that made my head tilt funny. Another 5 minutes went by. All my pains were mocking me. "If," I said to myself, "I can stand up, I am going to take another pain pill, and a sleeping pill, and some quinine so that a cramp doesn't come back and wake me if I should happen to fall asleep."
I placed my hand on the corner of the dresser near my bed, and bracing myself, began to stand up. The tremor in my hand dropped it off the dresser and I was plunked back down onto the bed. What to do? I looked at my pillow and tilted to the right and laid my head back down. I could take a deep breath in that position and it didn't hurt. Also, if I tilted just so, my shoulder didn't hurt as much. Another 10 minutes went by. Now I only had to wait three hours for a pain pill.
I pulled my legs back up under the covers and they both seemed relaxed. Now it was just me and the BOOM, boom; BOOM, boom. I conciously changed the rhythm of my breathing so they wouldn't coincide. I closed my eyes and began a string of Hail Mary's.
When I opened my eyes, another 20 minutes had gone by. I didn't feel any pain. Another couple of Hail Mary's in gratitude. The World Series of Poker was on ESPN2. I had seen that episode but it didn't matter because I didn't have my glasses on. They were scrolling sport scores along the bottom of the screen. The Nations had beat the Martians. The Corinthians had beat the Philistines 5 to 3. I reached for my glasses to see who the teams really were.
Big mistake. Several twinges reminded me that I wasn't supposed to be moving. So I lay very still and closed my eyes. Next time I opened them there were only 20 minutes to wait till I could have my next pill. Maybe I won't need it.
So I drifted off to sleep anxiously awaiting a visit from my good friend Mrs. "I-need-to-pee", and her sisters "right-now", and "hurry-up".
5 comments:
Ooooh, that is a dream I do not want to have, one that you feel pain in it. Being in Abu Ghareb is a better dream.
geez i thought you were describing a stroke or heart atack. I do not want to have that dream either, however I would have loved to catch that game.... the one where The Corinthians had beat the Philistines 5 to 3. I think that would have been a great game.
Has anyone gone and read Corinthians 5:3 yet? :-)
I certainly hope this was a dream that has gone away !!
Millions have read Corinthians 5:3, both the first letter and the second letter, niether of them are about baseball or hockey.
Wow! What's gonna happen when you get old? I have some foot pain right now, but only when I walk, not in my sleep. I also have awakened with cramps either in legs or toes. As Ma always said, "It's heck to get old."
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